Tanishq Tokas

Hi, this is Tanishq Tokas
I think my story is different because I never came out the right way in front of my family. My whole family was aware of me since my childhood that my actions are somewhat different, like wearing saris, makeup etc., etc. Even while ignorant, I did not knew about my sexuality in childhood I only knew that I like female characters but in the childhood I was never attracted to anyone for sex. The new lesson was added in my life when one of my cousins got physical with me and from then I know the meaning of it. As I grew up, I came to know that I was only attracted to boys in school and this continued in my college and I define myself and put me into gay category. There were so many fluctuations in my life since childhood from the age of 7, I struggled too much to face the audience whether my classmates or relatives because when I usually talked to others they make fun of my voice and expressions whether I was in college in graduation, post-graduation or in school. Even I also attempted suicide once but I managed to save myself as I want to complete my dream , I want to chase my dreams as a educationist and a successful filmmaker. So I went to a psychologist because of the behavior of my mates as well as family members as when I was suffering from the teasing in my education life, on the other hand in home too I suffered from the same from my siblings even today also. But again now too I am managing myself.
I came out in front of my siblings but all rejected me and dismissed me like I am not the part of this world. But I decided to come out in front of everyone in Delhi. I know it was too much difficult for me as at that time my family doesn’t know me except my siblings as I know if I out now i.e. in 2016 than they can boycott me easily while at that time I was pursuing my film production course as well as masters. But I couldn’t live with the dual faces. So I decided to come out through a documentary film made on me i.e. “Tanishq: The Untold Story”.

It was most appreciated movie in Delhi International Theatre and Film Festival 2016, was emotional and fully based on my reality. On that day I came out in front of more than 2000 audiences and got relief from the dual life concept of my life. From the movie “Tanishq” I realized that if I have so much of problems in life because of my sexuality then there are so many of my community people that are also suffering from the same problem or if not they should have some great motivational message to the LGBTQ Society. Then I decided with my close friend Raghuveer Sandhu to open a show name “Miss Woomaniya” LGBTQIA Interview Series which is totally based on the stories or the life of people and today also more than one lac people are appreciating this show from India and some from world.

Today this show covered 6 episodes including Homosexuality, Asexuality, The Exploration of Trans, Aspects of Gay marriage, Come out as Gay and Queer Charcha. In the next coming episode 7 we are focusing on the Effeminate and the Sissy one. Really it’s all possible because of the end of my dual life.
If I am talking about my today situations all are going well my life, my movie work and all Woomaniya work too. In fact in December Miss Woomaniya is the official partner of DIQTFF 2017 and I and my team are coming with a positive documentary movie name “Inaayat”. But on the other hand my sexuality is now a problem in my family today also because of their conservative thinking’s and all but today I am managing myself and continuing my work with and for my community because I and my god knows that I am not wrong just believe and move in your life.

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